How about an I-Opener? They're pretty easy to find, have most of what you want, and have hack links all over the 'net on how to add the rest. Best of all, if you ask nice, a lot of people will give them to you; when the company died the units instantly turned into large paperweights.

Let's see, add a HD and a USB 802.11b unit, throw it into a Pelican box [check local dive shops, you have plenty of those in FL :-) ], add an external antenna. Voila! You're ready to go dig that hole.

Hey, Now that I think about it, I believe I'll build one!
Cheers,
Thorn