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Old 03-23-2005   #16 (permalink)
Dutch
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thorn
That's no brainer: Give up buying food! Just hit on you're friends and relatives for dinner. THEY can go without sex.
Thats a solution... What are you having for dinner today Thorn ?

Dutch
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Old 03-23-2005   #17 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dutch
Thats a solution... What are you having for dinner today Thorn ?

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Obviously, he's having dinner at G8t's place tonight.
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Old 03-23-2005   #18 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Dutch
You're lucky.. They are talking about a sextax here. How can I explain to the wife we ain't gonna afford both food, and sleeping together more than once a year...

Food, sex, food, sex.. What is most important ? Decisions, decisions.. Ahh well, a good piece of sirloin steak, have been known to lure me away from a hot date before. I'll go for the food.

Dutch
At least with food you won't get slapped if you want "dark meat" for a change!!!

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Old 03-23-2005   #19 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by streaker69
Obviously, he's having dinner at G8t's place tonight.
TV-Dinners ehh ? Well, I'll pass, think I'll have some sex instead than...

Dutch
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Old 03-23-2005   #20 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by nashr
At least with food you won't get slapped if you want "dark meat" for a change!!!
Thats why any wellsupplied kitchen has a jar of nutella in the cupboard. Works equally well on bread, or women. Takes the fishy taste out of the latter.

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Old 03-23-2005   #21 (permalink)
Monitr7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dutch
You're lucky.. They are talking about a sextax here. How can I explain to the wife we ain't gonna afford both food, and sleeping together more than once a year...

Food, sex, food, sex.. What is most important ? Decisions, decisions.. Ahh well, a good piece of sirloin steak, have been known to lure me away from a hot date before. I'll go for the food.

Dutch
"Good lord, man! My hooker bills have jumped up over $200 a month!"
"Well, sir, why not try WTOTD Industries' 'Generic Prostitute'? It'll cut your extramarital financial woes by over 50%!"
"Generic Prostitute? Sounds good. But, how's it work?"
"Well, sir, you call us. We find a girl just right for your tastes (no pun intended, huh-huh-huh). The rest is an 'Ancient WTOTD Secret', but I can tell you it involves chloroform. Because the prostitute doesn't get paid, and we do, we effectively eliminate the middle man and pass the savings on to you!"
"Isn't that illegal?
"Don't worry, sir. Our crack team of lawyers are on call to bail you out, for a nominal fee, of course."
"Generic Prostitute. Where can I get one?"
"Call 1-800-GET-TAIL, and one of our somewhat friendly operators will assist you! Generic Prostitute; from WTOTD Industries! Get your phone, get your chick, get your nut... TODAY!"
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Last edited by Monitr7 : 03-23-2005 at 09:33 AM.
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Old 03-23-2005   #22 (permalink)
Dutch
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Monitr7
"Good lord, man! My hooker bills have jumped up over $200 a month!"
"Well, sir, why not try WTOTD Industries' 'Generic Prostitute'? It'll cut your extramarital financial woes by over 50%!"
"Generic Prostitute? Sounds good. But, how's it work?"
"Well, sir, you call us. We find a girl just right for your tastes (no pun intended, huh-huh-huh). The rest is an 'Ancient WTOTD Secret', but I can tell you it involves chlorofom. Because the prostitute doesn't get paid, and we do, we effectively eliminate the middle man and pass the savings on to you!"
"Isn't that illegal?
"Don't worry, sir. Our crack team of lawyers are on call to bail you out, for a nominal fee, of course."
"Generic Prostitute. Where can I get one?"
"Call 1-800-GET-TAIL, and one of our somewhat friendly operators will assist you! Generic Prostitute; from WTOTD Industries! Get your phone, get your chick, get your nut... TODAY!"
Do you ship internationally, or is this another of the damn offers only valid for US residents ?

Dutch
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Old 03-23-2005   #23 (permalink)
Monitr7
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Do you ship internationally, or is this another of the damn offers only valid for US residents ?

Dutch
Oh hell no; we're world-wide! I mean, yeah you have to pay some shipping, what with bribing customs officials to let you put a live human being on a plane in the cargo hold. But, I don't see to many other issues.
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Old 03-23-2005   #24 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by streaker69
Obviously, he's having dinner at G8t's place tonight.
He can help himself to the soup in the cabinets, I'll be out bangin' the neighbor's wi .....VISITING with the neighbors.
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Old 03-23-2005   #25 (permalink)
Thorn
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Originally Posted by G8tK33per
He can help himself to the soup in the cabinets, I'll be out bangin' the neighbor's wi .....VISITING with the neighbors.
Uh, don't tell me you're contemplating sex tax evasion.
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Old 03-23-2005   #26 (permalink)
Dutch
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Originally Posted by G8tK33per
He can help himself to the soup in the cabinets, I'll be out bangin' the neighbor's wi .....VISITING with the neighbors.
Have a heart man.. Put the soupcan on the counter, don't you know how hard it is to reach something on the top shelf in the cabinet, from a wheelchair...


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Old 03-23-2005   #27 (permalink)
Dutch
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Originally Posted by Thorn
Uh, don't tell me you're contemplating sex tax evasion.
Looks more like he is planning a sextax INvasion....

Ba da bum....

Dutch
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Old 03-23-2005   #28 (permalink)
Monitr7
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Ba dum dump!

How about a big hand for Monitr7! He's appearing all week here at the Wi-Improv.
Ha-ha-ha-ha-haaaa! Thanks, folks! Be sure to tip your waitresses. You're a great crowd!
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Old 03-23-2005   #29 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Dutch
Have a heart man.. Put the soupcan on the counter, don't you know how hard it is to reach something on the top shelf in the cabinet, from a wheelchair...


Dutch
I'll leave one of THESE by the counter.
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Old 03-23-2005   #30 (permalink)
Thorn
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Originally Posted by Dutch
Have a heart man.. Put the soupcan on the counter, don't you know how hard it is to reach something on the top shelf in the cabinet, from a wheelchair...


Dutch
I'm not that old, and when I do need one, the wheelchair come equipped with a V8, hydraulics, and a 22yo blond Swedish nurse. SHE'LL come equpped, too.
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