Stumblers and Stumblettes, welcome to the NS Forum WarTard of the Day Year in Re(tard)view!!! With: Monitr7, G8tK33per, and The Others! Now, here’s your host for the time being (unit G8 and Others show up), Monitr7!
/M7 comes on stage to much w00ting and bra-throwing. "Taking the Retards to the Zoo" by the Dead Milkmen plays.
Hey folks, howaya?! G8t’s not here yet, but will arrive later in the show. Something about a girl, green jello, and a midget. (/laughter) But hey; that’s neither here nor there. The Others will be here, too; drunk as hell and, more than likely, in a semi-nude state, for some reason or other. Don’t give him an excuse, people!
/the ladies in the audience go “WOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”.
Uh… ooookay. Thanks for coming to the WTOTD Year in Re(tard)view. We’ll be going over some of the best WTOTD segments since it’s inception earlier this year, as well as some other examples of the finest WarTardery in 2004! Unfortunately, we couldn’t get any of the previous victims, I mean tards, I mean guests to come back. Wonder why?
/flashes big media grin and winks. Pulls can of pepper spray out of his shiny green jacket. Mad laughter from the audience. Garbage cans go flying for no apparent reason.
We’ll also be hearing from some of our best forum flamers! How about a few flashbacks to some of their finer moments?
/more w00ting, with artificial limbs and blow-up dolls being thrown around the audience.
/cut to scenes of guest flamers
audit wrote:Get a goddamn clue, you moronic throwback of evolution!
/show audit in the audience, complete with “GIT-R-DONE” t-shirt, spit cup and beer cooler.
Mr. White wrote:I hope you get cancer in your ass.
In your ass.
/show Mr. White at unknown remote location. Mr. White flips off the audience and waves.
wrzwaldo wrote:Hey, fucktard…
/show wrzwaldo backstage, checking out the show’s supply of stun guns.
/cut back to M7, flashing almost jaw-breaking media grin
Ha-ha-HAAAAAAAA! Damn good thing we have these guys around. If G8, Others and I had to do all the verbal insults ourselves, after so many, I’d just start going for the pepper spray and the stun gun right off the get-go! Where’s the comedy in that?
Well, one of our first featured tards showed up in April of 2004. A suggestion was made, some insults were thrown, and a spelling lesson ensued. Roll the film, Ralfus!
/cut to khatfull sequence
Goddamn, that was cool, even though I got mildly smoked on it! Makes me wish I had more pepper spray and batteries for the stun guns at the time. But now, let’s take a trip even further down memory lane. Not only to remember a true tard among tards, but to also remember one of the best and brightest members of the forum, kick-ass mod, and all-around guru]/cut to Blackwave-Citrus exchange[/URL]
/wipes a tear from my eye
Holy shit! Y’know, some of the tards we’ve had on the WTOTD show have been real man-smelts, but ol’ Citrus really took the taco! Citrus was getting the crap beat out of him/her/it before I even got here, but his/her/its amazing acts of tardery were legendary. Ooo, for want of a bat with a nail in it!
/cut to show Others wandering the WTOTD studio, drinking a bottle of Chivas Regal and shouting something like, “Where’s retardsoftnut’s mom? Why am I not drunker-er yet?”.
Heh, heh, heh. Good to see Others in standard form! Speaking of rebrandsoftware, I hear he's now selling some software called "Please Stop Banging My Mom, 2.0". Unfortunately, we couldn't find the footage for him, as I hear it's been deemed hazardous material. Glad to hear he's doing okay, as he provided the WTOTD audience with much amusement at his expense. And now, Stumblers and Stumblettes, lemme bring out our first guest! The one; the only; audit!!!!!
/w00ting from audience. Empty beer cans fly on stage. Shouts of “GIT-R-DONE, audit!” abound. "Flirtin' With Disaster" by Molly Hatchet plays.
So, audit, welcome to the show! Tell me, what is your fondest tard-bashing memory, other than that one that involved the wood chipper and a pasta strainer?